Thursday, June 01, 2006

 

The Searchers

Hi! Welcome to yet another inaugural post.

I thought for this, the first post at the new place, I'd take the coward's way out and do a post about some of the searches people have done that have led them to me.

Hey! Come back! Some of these are good, I swear!

1) Flirting with cousins- Heh. I'd like to claim no knowledge of why someone would find me while looking for this, but the sad fact is that my family is southern, there are a LOT of cousins, and back in the day most of us were very attractive.

2) Donut Jokes- I get this one EVERY DAY. Who the hell needs that many donut jokes?

3) Kevin Eubanks' salary- (he's Jay Leno's band director) I don't how much Kevin makes, but he's hell on a horn.

4) I was charged for a free orthodontist consultation- Dude, that sucks, but there's really nothing I can do for you. I would suggest a call to your local Better Business Bureau.

5) slung of pig in a blanket- Um. Well, alrighty then.

6) world's laziest boss award- Wait, there's an award? Oh, hellz yeah, I'm a total shoe-in!

7) coping with brown nosers at work- I'll have to ask my boss, who is the sweetest, smartest, bestest boss in the whole world. ( I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.)

8) over 70 years old grannies masturbating (I actually cut the most offensive bits out of this one)- Dude, you need help. Seriously.

9) "copping a feel"- Well, it depends on whom you're copping, but in general, I'm all for it.

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